What is this mess? (Start here)

I know.  I know.  Who is Jes?  Why is she a mess?  And why would you want to listen/read anything that comes from her if she’s such a mess?  Allow me to explain…

 Hi.  I’m Jesica and the mess I’m referring to could be just about anything.  I’m a mess when I’m making something in the kitchen.  I’m a mess of tears, be it happy or sad or whatever the reason I’m crying (which is SO often).  My room is usually a mess because I seem to have an issue putting clean clothes away as soon as I’m done with laundry.  Sometimes life is a mess. 

When I first starting saying “Jes is a mess” (by way of #jesisamessagain on Instagram), it usually referred to me ending up in a puddle of tears.  The first time I used the hashtag was because my oldest baby sang to me for Mother’s Day and I was so overwhelmed with love both for her and from her that all I could do was cry (and, of course, give her lots of hugs and kisses).

I’ve been a crier for as long as I can remember.  When I was a crazy, emotional teenager, I looked forward to being an adult and not crying so much.  To my surprise, it got worse.  HA!  It’s now a joke amongst my close family and friends.  But I am completely okay with it because over the last few years, I’ve just learned to embrace that that’s who I am.  It’s how I’m wired.  I don’t allow myself to be run by my emotions but I do let myself just feel what I need to feel, cry however many tears need to be cried, and just let myself be. 

I’m a work in progress and every day I learn something about myself.  My hope in this blogging adventure is allow myself to be vulnerable, brave, and process with you and just maybe help you do the same.  We are all on our own journeys but what helps make them more manageable (I think) is when we have community – people that come alongside us, surround us when we need it, and cheer us on when things get rough. 

So I’m inviting you to share in my journey.  If you want, I would love to share in yours.  What do you say?

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