Lately my life has been chaotic and that’s putting it nicely. In the middle of this immensely painful season, we (my family as a unit and me by myself) are going through some major changes – some great, some not as great.

I was getting really down on myself because when I had my vision for my blog, I wanted to post 1-2 times a week. Clearly, I haven’t done that and subsequently, I have majorly disappointed myself. When I disappoint myself, I can’t let it go. I’m so hard and down on myself (I know some of you feel me here) because I always expect so much more of myself. But I’m learning, or at least trying to learn, to allow myself the space to make mistakes and fall short and giving myself grace in those moments. No one is harder on me than me. So no one can let me off the hook of disappointment except me. Today, in all things – blogging, parenting, work, life – I’m choosing grace. I’m terrible at it, guys. But I’m choosing to be as intentional as possible to try to breathe in grace and exhale stress and anxiety. Let’s be intentional together.

To fix or not to fix?

There are certain things I keep playing over and over in my head and I can’t decide whether it makes me a terrible human or a masochist.  Maybe both.  Some of it is my mess, some of it is other people’s mess… actually, the reality is that it’s just one big, giant mess.  And the more I sit here and think about it, the more I realize that I don’t actually have a problem with the mess itself.  My problem is that I can’t control it.  I can’t fix it.   Continue reading → To fix or not to fix?

Fighting From Darkness

As my life fell apart piece by piece over the last few weeks, I felt “me” slowly slipping into oblivion.  I started losing who I was and not just losing, but completely forgetting who I was altogether as if she never existed.  I found myself doing and thinking things that the real me never would have.  For the sake of me and my family, I needed to remember her.  I needed to find her… Continue reading → Fighting From Darkness

Knowing the “No.”

All my life I’ve been a people pleaser.  A peace-keeper. A say-yes-to-whatever-is-asked-of-you-to-lighten-everyone’s-load person.  Don’t get me wrong – all of those things can be good when they are done with the right mindset and that is more than just having good motives and a kind heart.  The truth is, you can be all those things, well-intentioned and kind-hearted included, and it be totally unhealthy.  And after twenty-nine years of being this person, I broke. Continue reading → Knowing the “No.”